For the first time in about 4 years (maybe one more, maybe one less), I actually got to go to my sister’s annual Halloween party!
I went as “Poison Ivy” (sans the mask), and Matt went as…a horse of course. I did have a lot of fun, I did drink quite a bit, and I did twerk. Somehow. I never thought I’d a) have the desire to twerk and b) the capability but apparently, my drunken super power is twerking. I understand Miley a little better now. She must drink a lot.
I started to feel sick and beyond exhausted at about midnight, so we came home. I crashed hard.
Archer woke up around 2am for a bum change but thankfully went right back to sleep. When both kids woke up at 6am, I promptly remembered why a night of drinking when you have kids is a terrible idea. They don’t sleep in, nor do they care if you’re hungover.
Luckily I was able to bully Matt into getting up with them. And by bully, I mean beg…
There was a situation at the party that made me feel…uncomfortable, and insecure. Surprise surprise right? More often than not when you mix an emotionally sensitive girl with alcohol, you’ll get that. But I don’t think I was unjust in feeling that way.
I ran into one of my MIL’s friends, and she introduced me to her husband.
“This is Matt’s wife, Jess,” she said.
He immediately said “Ah ya eh? Matt used to be so obsessed with our daughter!”
I thought it was an odd thing to say, considering I’d just been introduced as Matt’s wife. But odder still was the fact that he continued to talk about Matt’s apparent obsession with their daughter, about how it went on for years and years and he’d follow her everywhere. The more he talked, the more uncomfortable and insecure I felt. Then he said “He should see her now!” suggestively. Yes, suggestively. Like Matt would be impressed with what he saw.
At this point, I literally walked away. I didn’t say another word to either of them. When we got home, I told Matt about it and he laughed.
“I was like 6 and she was 2, I was never obsessed with her or even remotely attracted to her. That’s just gross. That’s just the way [he] is. Always bragging about himself and his kids. Wanting to make everyone feel less.”
And I know he’d have told me if he did used to have a crush on that girl. We’re honest about stuff like that with each other, and stuff in the past is in the past.
It wasn’t at all that I was insecure because I thought Matt still liked her, or because I thought he would if he saw her again. I was insecure because someone was intentionally trying to make me feel bad. It sucks that I allowed them to succeed, but it’s hard to not be affected by stuff like that when you’re drunk. Which is exactly why I don’t drink often…
But even when I don’t drink, I can’t help but be overly affected by random people’s words, especially when their intent is…unkind. I wish I had the back bone to tell people where to go, but after all this time I still don’t have what it takes to put people in their place. Unless I’m writing, that works…no idea why, but hey…I’ll take it.
Anyway, that was the Halloween party and today is Halloween!
Be safe and have fun, Ghouls and Boos.