13 Comments


  1. Yes yes yes! You know I agree with this 100 percent. This is internet shaming at its worst. People should feel free to express themselves and if you don’t like it then don’t read their statuses or whatever. You can look away!

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    1. I agree! You don’t have to keep people on your Facebook friends list, there is no rule about that. But why must they constantly be “reminded” to keep their “issues” to themselves by “concerned friends and family”? If they were concerned they wouldn’t silence them.

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  2. It’s tough because I know that seeing people constantly complaining on social media can be draining. I would never dream of telling someone to “be quiet”. I use the “look away” method. I’ve unfriended people, or used my handy-dandy Facebook settings to ensure that I don’t see their updates. Easy peasy.

    I think there are still a lot of people out there who live by the “rule” that we shouldn’t talk about our issues. It makes people uncomfortable because I think it reminds them that their own lives aren’t all that perfect, either. You have no idea what I went through in terms of my divorce. It was shocking how some people reacted. But I digress.

    I think that it’s important for us, as a society, to talk about what’s wrong! That’s the only way to remove the stigma from things like depression, eating disorders, anxiety, you name it. Shame only makes these issues worse. Particularly when the shame is completely unnecessary…after all, we’ve all got “skeletons” of some sort in our closets.

    Another great, thought-provoking post.

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    1. Thanks hun! I have also lost patience and blocked/deleted people over it, and that’s ok I think. If it’s actually draining you, and stressing you out…that’s totally understandable.

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  3. One of the reasons I stick with Facebook is that it enables me to keep in touch with dear friends and family members in other cities. The Facebook status becomes a proxy for cues of body language and tone of voice that tell you when someone you are talking to is going through a bad spell. Like you, I will reach out privately if I sense the person needs some care.

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    1. That’s why I stay on Facebook, despite my mulitple issues with it. That’s where everyone is. I’m glad you reach out too! Your friends and family are lucky to have you 🙂

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  4. I love all of your Facebook posts lately. Especially because they actually talk about the issues going on. Not the little things like, oh Facebook did an update again and I can’t find my home button. 🙂 Although, it is frustating, and I am sure someone, somewhere, is going to Google it to find a blog about it. But, your posts are real and. brutality honest.

    I’ve seen the comments you’re talking about and I’ve actually realized comments like them. Except, mine are that I post too much and should start a blog. Ironically enough, I had a blog then. After a few more comments like them, I simply removed the person because they OBVIOUSLY didn’t know how to hide my posts.

    I really appreciate the truth to this. We really don’t know what’s going on in a person’s life. I used to “air” laundry to family or in private groups because I was taught not to as a kid and that lead me to holding it all in which caused me to go down a path of self-mutilation not knowing how to deal with it. When you don’t have a best friend or someone to talk it through with, you look to other fields. Facebook is a popular one.

    I really appreciate the “think” acronym. Something I think I have to hold onto in my own life at times.

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    1. Thank you Meg! I’m sorry you felt that way, that’s what I’m hoping people will see though…when they silence other peoples truths, tell them to stop complaining, they feel even more isolated and alone. I know I did too.

      Thank you for sharing this post too, and I’m glad you like the “think” method. I saw that and was like…how accurate. Imagine if everyone followed that?

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  5. Haven’t had coffee yet so, back again with the rest of my train of thought– 🙂 …

    One thing that I’ve heard a lot is when you ask someone how they are doing and they simply say “fine” because it’s the “acceptable” answer. But, if you go back and ask, how are you REALLY doing? They often have a different response.

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  6. I found this very encouraging this morning as I struggled to write about one of the darkest parts of my life. Thank you! I love to respond to people who are going through shit. I’m no ambulance chaser, but I want to serve my friends. Most of the time though, my friends PM me. There have been times when I’ve been constantly reading violent status updates by somebody telling her sister off or something, and I’ve just removed them from my feed, rather than my friends’ list. Mostly because threatening language causes me a lot of stress, but also because I wanted to interact with that person lovingly in real life, and I thought the constant negativity would change the way I interacted with her in real life.

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