I know that people get busy. I get busy. Usually, I’m nonstop busy (I have more leeway when I’m recovering from surgery, I have to force myself to relax). I may not have a steady 9-5 job in an office, but I am constantly on the clock. Day and night. That’s parenthood. In addition to my full-time position as a stay-at-home mom, I’m working my Scentsy business and focusing on my writing pretty much full time.
I do struggle with finding balance. I do stretch myself thin trying to accomplish all I want to accomplish. But despite that, I try hard to keep my friendships with people…current.
I like to check in with my friends and hear how they are doing. I like to catch up. I know I am guilty of falling off the grid too, but I’m fairly decent at remembering to send text messages. I always reply, if not in that moment, then I will the first chance I get.
I schedule coffee dates with my kidless friends and play dates with my friends with kids every so often. It may not happen every week, but it happens at least once a month.
I get it. We have jobs and things that take precedence. We are tired, we are busy. Nobody told us how much the daily grind would suck, how hard it would be to just make ends meet. We saw witty movies and tv sitcoms about adulthood that depicted friends having fun and being silly with occasional glimpses into work life (here’s looking at you, Friends). The reality of being an adult is much more…exhausting. Suffocating.
We have responsibilities, now. We each have to-do lists that seem to go on forever and ever. No matter how many we cross off, more get added. And I know…I can get lost in the stress of my to-do list too.
But I do always try my hardest, and I can tell you right now…if I had a friend who needed a shoulder to cry on, I would pretty much drop everything to be there. I may have my rugrats attached to my hips, and I may have to take breaks to, you know…feed them or take them somewhere, but I always try to make myself available for friends in need.
Why? Because I’ve been in a position where it felt like I had nobody. I’ve been alone and sad and stressed out about life and responsibilities and to-do lists. Every once in a while, it is so so important to carve out just an hour of friend time, where you catch up and rant about the stresses and laugh about how things have changed so much since high school, when your biggest worries and fears were along the lines of “am I going to get caught smoking weed in behind the library?“, not “how am I going to afford rent/food/insurance this month?“.
Busy is real. Busy is legit. But breaking away is so important, not just for your sake but for your friends’ sake too. Maybe they need your goofy support for just an hour.
I think that in this day and age, we’re all so guilty and selfish when it comes to our individual wants. We think, well I’m busy and I’m tired and I can’t take on anything else. That may be true (sometimes), but I find with myself…when I lend a helping hand or a listening ear to a friend in need, I feel better about myself as a whole.
It’s that “spread love and kindness” thing, it truly does pay off.