8 Comments


  1. Amen! It’s wrong to tell anyone not to cry. I’m a woman and I’ve been told not to cry. Boys constantly hear it and it’s straight up emotional repression.

    Reply

    1. True! Emotional repression is never good. It just gets worse down the road.

      I also get told to not be so emotional, or my emotional outbursts are chalked up to “that time of the month”…but that’s a post for another day 😉

      Reply

  2. I couldn’t agree with you more! This has been going on for far too long. So many other things have changed in society in the last 50 years but this hasn’t seen any progress. Too many angry men walking around that weren’t allowed to express other emotions. Hopefully, there are a lot more people like you who’ll be working to make a difference for the future of mankind. 🙂

    Reply

    1. Thank you! I’m hearing from a lot of moms that they don’t repress their sons emotions so this is GOOD!!! Maybe this generation stands a chance at kicking that old bullshit mindset to the curb!

      Reply

  3. I think there are applications for emotional repression in balanced ways. Keeping it on a leash is good practice for everybody, and I mean all genders. There’s a time and a place for everything. Like, I can’t just cry and break down emotionally while driving my Pepsi truck through a school zone during lunch hour. But this applies to everybody. Not just men. Because if I do break down while driving a rig, I won’t be able to see, and will be less in control, reducing my reaction time. I’ll probably run over a kid if I allow that to happen. Not because I’m a man, but because that circumstance does not allow for expression. I know that’s an extreme and particular example, but it’s a metaphor. We can damage others emotionally when we fling our own emotions around unchecked. Sometimes repression is necessary. I don’t have the right to express emotions any time, any place, and in every circumstance, if doing so will harm others. I have the right to feel those things, but the application shouldn’t harm others.

    That’s the big issue here. We’re telling people how to feel. But that’s ridiculous. People feel the way they feel. That doesn’t change unless you change the core of a person. One way to do that is by breaking their spirit. And that’s exactly what is happening to our boys (and to our girls in other ways).

    I absolutely agree that this societal obsession with forcing boys not to cry is damaging and ridiculous. If I’m a man driving that Pepsi truck and I need to cry, I should damn well find a spot, pull over, and let it out. And anyone who sees me shouldn’t just start laughing or talking about how weak I am. They should just go “that guy’s having a bad day. I know what that’s like. Maybe I can help.” But no, that’s not considered socially valid. I should instead ram that truck into the side of a Safeway, hurt people that way, lose my job and go to prison, because for a man, all of those things are some-fucking-how a more valid expression of emotion.

    And this “anger is the only option” thing… So true. Two emotions. That’s what men can have. Out of the millions of emotions there are, and the infinite spectrum of human expression, we may either be content… or angry. No sadness, no confusion, no loneliness, no elation, even overt happiness and excitement are considered weakness in men.

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *