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  1. For dirty house, add several kids to one husband and mix well. Then, give a damn.
    For clean house, stay blissfully single forever so you have time to clean your bottles of cleaner. (I did this last week. It was awesome.)
    Hints for future owners of teenagers: when they “forget” to clean their bathroom for the third time, wait until they are asleep and then tape their smartphone discreetly to the back of the Windex bottle and push it to the back of the shelf. The following morning, when there is a lull in the panicked searching, crying, and hysteria, recommend a meditative session of cleaning to center themselves.

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    1. Haha this is amazing! And true. I have filed that suggestion away for future use. Thank you!

      Reply

  2. My house has to be clean like all the time.

    Can you teach my wife your secrets? She’s got the ADD, but not the OCD. Oh wait, that’s me. She got me a sign today that says: “I have CDO. It’s kind of like OCD but all the letters are in alphabetical order as they should be.”

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    1. I need the sign! And I never really win that battle. Kids and all lol

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